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Dalton
Roberts |
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A reader reminded me of the personal pleasure in learning to listen. She wrote, “Blessed rain falls slowly. I love the pitter-patter as it dances on the roof. Wind chimes softly tinkling. Sweet morning. I sit here in this quiet room listening to the rain and the old clock ticking.” See how engrossed she is in listening? She hears it all – the rain, the wind chimes and the clock. She doesn’t mention listening to the inner unfolding of her own thoughts but once you learn to listen, that is life’s extra gift to you. Learning to really listen was a mid-life thing for me. I set aside a morning quiet time to do breathing exercises to lower my blood pressure. Over time I varied the breathing exercises with other meditative activities like bird watching, journaling and a half dozen other techniques but the one constant was a time of stillness and quietness. Surprisingly, it helped my emotions more than my blood pressure. I went into my day centered, calm and joyous. I was more effective in handling the hectic schedule I had at that busy time of my life. I started off with 15 minutes of quiet and in a short time I was setting aside a full hour. It became indispensable to me because of the deep peace and quiet focus it imparted. I had no idea how scattered I had been until that time. It never occurred to me that I needed to slow down and quietly observe my world and my own thoughts. I had always hit the floor running. As the morning stillness did it’s miraculous work on me, I could look back and see that when I hit the floor running, I was often running on empty. A wonderful result of this change in lifestyle was the immense increase in creative ideas. I realized I was contacting a deeper dimension of myself – the layer of consciousness where creative solutions are born. Yes, it started with 15 minutes, and then became an hour and now I have listening days! The best way to sharpen your listening skills is to set aside a listening day. I mean, schedule it. Note it on your daily agenda. It doesn’t have to be a day you are off from work. Maybe the first couple of listening days might work better if you are off from work but when you get the hang of it you will find it works just as well on a workday. On your listening days, don’t be surprised if people notice a difference in the quality of your energy. You will feel it, too, as surely as a solar cell feels the power of the sun. As you develop the habit of really listening to people they will seek your companionship more often. One of the rarest things on this planet is a person who really listens to people. Try to tell a short story about some experience and you will be lucky if you get through it. As soon as you start, you will remind someone of their own story and they will interrupt you until you forget your own story! When we listen, we are often only half-listening. The other half of our brain is trying to think of what we can say when the talker gets through. With listening days, you can break this pattern. Really listen to everyone you meet all day. You will certainly have some times of boredom because not everyone is a ball of fire. But do it for yourself as well as those you meet all day. You are giving yourself the priceless gift of listening. In time, you may hear some amazing things like Rodney Crowell mentions in his “Song of Life.” He wrote, “Somehow I’ve learned how to listen, to the sound of the sun going down.” He had graduated from listening with his ears to listening with his soul.
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