Buford was a drunk. For 25 years his wife went to church Wednesday, Sunday morning and Sunday night and always requested prayer that Buford would quit drinking and live a sober, Christian life.
One night Buford came home drunk and sick. He must have gotten hold of some bad whiskey. He woke his wife, asking her to pray for him.
She was elated. She knelt by her bed with Buford and began, “Lord, my prayers have been answered. Buford has come home drunk and is asking for your help.” Buford whispered in her ear, “Don’t tell Him I am drunk. Tell Him I am sick.”
A friend told this to me as a funny story and it was funny to me. I sometimes use it in my performances. But seeing wives like Buford’s wife and one man who lived with a woman who stayed drunk most of her life raises a big question for me.
Why do people live with drunks and abusers all the years they are given here on earth? Do they feel they are on some divine mission to save them? Do they actually feel responsible for them? Have they been abused so badly they expect it? Do they have such low self-esteem that they think they deserve nothing better?
Just because you misjudge someone and come to learn he is a drunk does not mean you are obligated to live with him. Unless you cherish the feeling of being his potential savior, it is a sin against yourself.
If you live with him and he changes toward the end of his life, you have thrown away most of yours wet-nursing a self-centered jackass. If you live with him and he doesn’t change, two lives have been wasted -- yours and his.
What’s the difference in the primitive practice of throwing a young virgin in the volcano to appease the gods and throwing yourself into a miserable, abusive marriage? Does the virgin appease the volcano god? No more than throwing your life away will appease or please your god.
We are not responsible to save anyone except our own selves. However, you can choose to give away your life if you want to. Just think it through and make sure that’s what you want to do with it.
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